Six.

Six years seems like such a long time, but yet flies by so incredibly fast.
Six years ago today my cousin and his best friend were taken back to live with our Heavenly Father. I will never know why they were needed, I'll never know why that's fair, and I probably never will.
I'll never forget that day.
Chris and I grew up together. Coming from a small town we were the only two kids in our sunday school classes. I always looked up to him and wanted to be more like him. He was the kind of person who didn't care what other people though of him, and had so many friends of different backgrounds. EVERYONE loved him. When he told a story, all eyes were on him, knowing that whatever shenanigans he was up to lately had to be good. I consider myself so blessed to have put in his seminary class that last year of his life.
We were 17 the day he died, it was also our grandma's birthday. So when I got a voicemail from my dad saying he was at Grandma's and that there had been a family problem I didn't think too much about it. When I came home, I could sense something was wrong. Cupboards were left open, TV and lights on, and no one in sight. I called my dad immediately, knowing there was more to his message. From the sound of his voice my stomach immediately sunk. He told me to sit down. The next words over his phone put me into a complete shock. I had prepared myself for maybe Grandma going to the hospital, she was after all in her 90's. But no. Chris had been killed in a car accident that evening. Broadsided by a Tundra, and killed on impact. Why? Why him? Why now? "A good kid, only 17, I still wonder about that."
That day forever changed how I look at life. It made me realize that life is not fair, it's unpredictable, and sometimes it just plain sucks.
It has made me mad at times, and frustrated. There are so many people in this world who are murderers, rapists, thieves, suicidal, etc. People who want to die. People who some say should. But then there are those who love life. Who have only been here for a few short years and have everything taken away in an instant.
Today, I reflect on what is most important in life. And I also take time to remember Chris's story. I never want to forget what his life and his death have both taught me.
Today I went to his grave. I saw Jezebel, his truck. I saw his house. I thought of him.
I remembered the tender mercies of the Lord around that time. The strangers who blessed me without knowing. The incredible friends I have who cried with me, the friends I made through this experience, and the increased understanding of the Plan of Salvation. I am so thankful that someday, I will see him again.
Today, I write this to remember.